Al Franken Famous Quotes
"When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both."
"Im good enough, Im smart enough, and dog-gone it, people like me."
"Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from."
"The biases the media has are much bigger than conservative or liberal. They're about getting ratings, about making money, about doing stories that are easy to cover."
It's easier to put on slippers than to carpet the whole world.
Al Franken Quotations
Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
Lily Tomlin
"There are no thanks for a kindness, which has been delayed."
Anonymous
"Dr. Evil The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it."
Austin Powers International Man of Mystery
"If you want to make certain a job gets done, give it to somebody who is really busy. They'll have their secretary do it."
Joe Moore
"Happy the man, and happy he alone, He who can call today his own He who secure within can say Tomorrow do thy worst, for I have lived today."
Horace
"Freedom is just Chaos, with better lighting."
Alan Dean Foster
Poverty must not be a bar to learning and learning must offer an escape from poverty.
Lyndon B Johnson
"I wonder if the polite thing to do is always the right thing to do. When I met the family from Japan, they all bowed. I pretended like I was going to bow, but then I just kept going and flipped over on my back. I did this five times. I think they got the point."
Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
"It is not the critic that counts not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or the doer of deeds could have them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the Arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood who strives valiantly who errs and comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming but he who does actually strive to do the deed who knows the great devotion who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails while daring greatly, knows that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls, who know neither victory nor defeat."
Theodore Roosevelt
"I love all beauteous things, I seek and adore them God hath no better praise, And man in his hasty days Is honored for them."
Robert Bridges