Robert Benchley Famous Quotes
"For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting."
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
"An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens."
"Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony."
"It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."
"Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing."
"As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did."
"A boy can learn a lot from a dog obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down."
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
"I can't bring myself to say, 'Well, I guess I'll be toddling along.' It isn't that I can't toddle. It's just that I can't guess I'll toddle."
Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
"There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe there are two kinds of people in the world and those who don't."
Robert Benchley Quotations
You've got to have something to eat and a little love in your life before you can hold still for any damn body's sermon on how to behave.
Billie Holiday
"My belief has always been ... that wherever in this land any individual's constitutional rights are being unjustly denied, it is the obligation of the federal government-at point of bayonet if necessary-to restore that individual's constitutional rights."
Ronald Reagan
"If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers."
Doug Larson
"My fellow Americans, I must speak to you tonight about a mounting danger in Central America that threatens the security of the United States. This danger will not go away it will grow worse, much worse, if we fail to take action now."
Ronald Reagan
"The little I know, I owe to my ignorance."
Sacha Guitry
Ah the clock is always slow It is later than you think.
Robert Service
Be not surprised if thou findest thyself in possession of unexpected wealth. Allah will provide an unexpected use for it.
James J Roche
"Every morning you are handed 24 golden hours. They are one of the few things in this world that you get free of charge. If you had all the money in the world, you couldn't buy an extra hour. What will you do with this priceless treasure Remember, you must use it, as it is given only once. Once wasted you cannot get it back."
Unknown
"I never blame myself when I'm not hitting. I just blame the bat and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn't my fault that I'm not hitting, how can I get mad at myself"
Lawrence Peter Berra
"And so, my fellow americans ask not what your country can do for you - ask what you can do for your country. My fellow citizens of the world ask not what America will do for you, but what together we can do for the freedom of man."
John F Kennedy